Writing, Hating Writing, and Turning Older

So, I have reached 20k on my NaNo! Yay!

I have lined out a list of my long projects for the future. These will be the novel-length stories that I write. I'm not going to try to plan out what short stories I do though. I plan on just doing those sporadically, during the longer projects, when I need a short break. My list so far:

Mercy of the Void: Current NaNo, first story in my epic
Varia: A story about a thief who wakes up to find he's become a girl
Sound of Drums: Next story in my epic
Sea-Song: A story about the sudden sentience of whales and dolphins
The Long Road: Last story in my epic
Creep: Old story I'll be ready to finish by that time
Dark Town: A supernatural story set in a small town
Canter: A fantasy romance of sorts

I need to get this list laid out and set pretty clear in my head though. If I don't, I might not get anything written. And, I can't do that. I've got to get this stuff all written out. So, getting a schedule of sorts prioritized in my head is the proper thing to do.

Had a talk with my writing teacher yesterday. Found out I have to both change the topic of my paper and, as a consequence of that, I have to redo half of the homework I have already turned in if I want a better grade. I do, so I'll go ahead and redo everything. Part of this is my own fault, for not understanding and not trying to clarify that misunderstanding.

I just wish that there wasn't so much of an emphasis on non-fiction writing in college. I hate non-fiction writing. It's horrible and boring. All I'm doing is looking up facts that other people have already found out and copying them down again, with the proper citations of course. There's no imagination in that, no fun at all. I don't see much of a draw to it, and I can't understand why people are all so crazy about writing these things. You should be out discovering new things for yourself, not simply retreading all this old stuff.

I also need to type out a waka poem and a paper explaining it for my World Literature class. That's due next Monday, but I figure getting it done today would be better than doing it over the weekend. This weekend is reserved for math, NaNo, and redoing writing homework, in that order.

On another note, Monday is my birthday! Yay! I won't be celebrating it though. Mom is sending a care package to me, but that's about it. I don't have the money to celebrate it, really. Besides, it's just a birthday. I'll go to class and stuff just like any other day.

Well that's about it for me this time. I've got to go to writing class next. Joy and wonder, undoubtedly.

NaNo, Characters, Haikus

So, already 16k into my NaNo. This number pleases me. It's not as far along as some are. I know of one person who finished already. But, I don't begrudge them that. I am satisfied with where I am at with my NaNo. It still means that I will get done early, and that makes me very happy.

Brainstormed over a potential new story idea. I'm going to talk about some of the characters that might be involved, since they're about all that I've got at the moment.

Cunningham is a teenage genius. He got this way via reading voraciously at every opportunity he got, and applying the knowledge that he acquired. He likes to play with people by manipulating them along to see what they will do. He likes to dress in nice clothes, and almost always in the color green. To see him in any other color is a rare thing. His nice appearance hides the fact that he does not have a great many of the same morals that most people do. He has only two real rules: Never harm a child or the innocence of a child, and deal violently with the perverts of the world.

Erica Patterson is also a teenage genius. She got that way due to her parents home-schooling her and focusing her attention on learning. She believes in rules and patterns, and tries to manipulate people to follow them, since she does not believe that people are inherently good. She does not care to dress up very well, but is a very moral person. She is also a black belt in Muay Thai.

Cunningham and Erica come into conflict because Cunningham dislikes Erica's obsession with following predictable patterns, and Erica dislike's Cunningham's seeming lack of morals. They often match wits and try to outdo each other. However, while they maintain an adversarial relationship, they do not go to the extremes with it, merely using the intellect of the other as an opportunity to test and strengthen their own.

So, those are the two main characters. There are supporting casts for the both of them, each one unique in itself. But, I can't really think of any story ideas to go with these characters. I came up with a kind of throwaway one about Cunningham coming into possession of a locket that changes his gender, and I was told by one of my two main editors that I should go with that. And, I will try it, I think. Only after my NaNo is done though. I'm not going to drop out of that anytime soon.

My writing teacher wants to meet with me tomorrow at one o'clock. I don't know about that. I've never had a teacher be all, "I would like to speak with you," to me and have it be good. Someone said that they probably just want to do what teachers usually do when they talk to parents in high school. Somehow that just doesn't make me feel any better about the whole thing. Oh well. I will go and do it and then it will be over and I will be done.

for the orca knows truth
strips meat and color from bone
he is the winter

Yay for me and haiku! I like to write some every now and then. I don't consider myself very good at it, but that one right there is one of my better ones. I'm quite proud of it.

And, on that note. farewell!

Abide With Me

I really like the Japanese poetry we learned about in World Literature. Trying my hand at some waka was quite interesting, and I like the result. Hopefully my teacher will as well.

I would like a chance to blog about something personal for a moment, if that is all right with you all.

There are a great many things that I would like to not lose in this world. These are things that make my heart ache at just the thought of a world without them. And, sometimes, when that possibility becomes very real, I find that my heart aches greatly. But I do not know what to do. I pray to God, but I have a hard time believing that he will preserve that which I love dearly. I know he can, and I want to give this up to him, but I find it very hard to let go of this particular cross. I don't even know if it should be my cross, and yet its burden is one I am very loath to relinquish.

There, that's all I wanted to say on the personal front. Thank you for letting me say it.

NaNo is going well. I'm not as far ahead as some people, but I am a good distance ahead, and will do my best to increase that distance tomorrow. I also need to do some algebra, and some writing though, so it may be that I only get to work on it later in the evening. I will work on it though, and get at least 2k churned out. I rather like being ahead of the bare minimum. I'll also probably look forward to the weekends this November, so that I can really get ahead.

My editor, yes, I have an editor now, sent me back an edited version of an early story of mine called Terror Train. She pointed out some places where it could be improved, and I patched those up. She's sending it off to Science Fiction and Fantasy at some point, and will look at another one later. I need to find a way to pay her back, really. She's doing all of this for free, and is being very resistant when I suggest paying her back. Anyone out there have any suggestions?

Revisited a bit of my childhood this weekend. Found an old clip of the opening to Hercules: The Legendary Journeys. I loved that show back in the day. For those of you who are not familiar with it, it featured Kevin Sorbo as Hercules as he wandered the earth battling the minions of his wicked stepmother Hera, the all powerful queen of the gods. And where ever there was evil, where ever an innocent would suffer, there would be Hercules. It was quite an awesome show, and I always enjoyed watching it when I was a little kid. Seeing the opening sequence again made me feel really good and nostalgic.

Now, I must sleep.

NaNo

The Engine Driver by The Decemberists is pretty good. It mentions writers and things, so of course it has a good point to it. :)

Going to do NaNo. I'm going to try to write the first book in my epic, if for no other reason than I need a very good reason in order to get it out. NaNo tends to make people move along very quickly in their writing, and this is something that I need just so that I can get started. :P

It is fun to try to plan it all out, and to help others plan it out. I'm doing that right now. Someone's trying to make an alternate history where America got it's independence much later, and I suggested that there should be a massive war between Mexico and Britain that resulted in the dropping of an alchemaic atomic bomb. He likes that idea. Haha.

Madeleine L'Engle

So, I don't really know if I can do this right. I mean, this woman and her writing have shaped the way I write, and to some extent the way I think, a great deal. And I don't know if I can really do that justice. But, I will try.

I enjoy everything about Madeleine L'Engle's books. They always engage me. She fills them to the brim with interesting topics. We're talking things like quantum physics and organ regeneration. And she mixes them in with very engaging narrative and characters. And then throws a bit of fantasy in for good measure. I love that.

I can honestly care about the characters in her books. In fact, her books were the first ones I read where the characters within actually seemed like real people. It was awesome for me at the time. And even now after I've read tons of other books with engaging characters, it's still pretty awesome.

The way in which she weaves that sense of the beyond is also wonderful. Even in her more mundane plots, such as in Meet The Austins, there is always a sense of something greater behind everything, some force out there that is watching out for all that is good. It's a marvelous thing.

I honestly can't imagine that I would have even started writing were it not for her. After I read "A Ring of Endless Light," I immediately wanted to write something. And not in that, "I know I can write something better than that." Not at all. It was because I hope that one day, I will write something that is just as good as that book. I still haven't quite gotten to that point yet, of course. But it's a goal I can keep my eyes on.

I just wish that I had thought enough to write her a letter before she died. I wanted to tell her just how much her books meant to me, how much I loved them. But I never thought to write a letter. That's the one thing I regret, actually, that I never wrote a letter to Madeleine L'Engle to tell her thank you for writing and for sharing her works with the world.

One of the things on my bucket list is to go to the Cathedral of St. John the Divine in Manhattan, where she is interred, and place a copy of "A Ring of Endless Light" at her grave. On the inside cover, I will write out that letter that I never did, thanking her for everything. It's the least that I can do to pay my respects to an amazing writer, and an inspiring woman.

On Writing That Is Not My Own

I think I'm going to talk about works of literature that I enjoy, this time. Because I can.

Off the top of my head, there are a few poems that really stand out. The first one is a little one called "The Yes and the No, Redondo," by Greg Pape. It's about this kid jumping off of a fishing pier so that his girlfriend will have sex with him, but there's a bit more to it than that, and I think that it's in the description. It's been a long time since I've read it though. I can't seem to find it anywhere. If one of you silent readers out there manages to find it, become vocal and let me know. You'll win the prize of my eternal gratitude.

"The Hollow Men" by T.S. Elliot is also a good poem. I've turned to it for inspiration time and again, even directly basing one story off of it. I like not only the description of it, but how it lets the reader examine the downsides of modern life. It was one of the first poems that I actually understood what it was about in that respect. That's a big thing for me, since usually I have to be told what a poem is about.

"Childe Roland to the Dark Tower Came" is another poem that really sticks out in my mind. I came across it due to another work of literature which I will be naming later. Though at first I liked it due to its placement in the other work of literature, I have come to appreciate it on its own terms. I think being able to memorize the entire thing would be pro, so I have gotten an audio version to try to do just that.

"The Cremation of Sam McGee" is another poem I would love to be able to memorize and recite. It would be a tad easier than "Childe Roland," that's for sure. But I also like it on its own merits. For one, I can follow the story in it well. And it's a very well presented story as well. The Great White North that Robert Service loved to write about is a part of the world that also intrigues me, and he has put a very interesting story in it. With bits of the psychological and the supernatural, this poem is definitely one of my all-time favorites.

"Jabberwocky" I do have memorized. I know that it's a bit of nonsense verse and as such is often regarded as children's literature. But, if you recite it right, this poem sounds downright epic. I've got a version of it in song form by someone called Donovan. They have a simple acoustic guitar and drum accompaniment, with a bit of synth in one certain point, and it makes that poem sound really awesome.

And, I'll also say that I like one fragment of a poem. The first stanza of "The World," by Henry Vaughan is very awesome.

I saw Eternity the other night
Like a great ring of pure and endless light
all calm as it was bright
And round beneath it, Time in hours, days, years
Driven by the spheres
Like a vast shadow moved; in which the world
And all her train were hurled

Now, on to prose fiction. I'll come right out and say that my all time favorite book in the world is "A Ring of Endless Light" by Madeleine L'Engle. Anything by her is good, super good, but that one book just takes the cake across the board.

And, before I go on and talk about "A Ring of Endless Light," let me say that the next blog entry I do will be devoted to Madeleine L'Engle, because my writing demands to show how she has affected it.

Anyways, what makes "A Ring of Endless Light" so good is a combination of many factors. It is a teenage romance, where the main character, Vicky Austin, must choose between three boys that want her heart. Figuratively, not literally. But, it is also a speculative fiction novel, because she has a gift of being able to "empathize" with dolphins, able to share feelings on such a strong level it is deeper than most fictional forms of telepathy. And, it also deals with the subject of death, since Vicky's grandfather is dying of cancer. So, in a sense, it is also a spiritual novel, forcing the main character and others in the story to come to grasp with the concept of something beyond. It is incredibly touching. There's a movie version of it, but that sucks, as it's only a made for Disney Channel adaptation, nothing even close to the original novel. Go out and read "A Ring of Endless Light." You won't regret it.

Anything by Stephen King I tend to like, not only because I feel that he is a very good storyteller, but because he ties his stories together in little ways. He does this by feeling free to put in tidbits in one book that are the same as the tidbits in another. No where is this more prevalent than in his works "The Stand" and the entire Dark Tower series. "The Stand" starts off as a sci-fi novel about a superflu that wipes out most of the Earth's population, but turns into a fantasy novel as the survivors become embroiled in a battle of good and evil. Though it is an extremely long novel, I feel that it is well worth however long it takes to read it.

The Dark Tower series is the work of literature that lead me to the Browning poem I mentioned earlier. It tells the story of Roland of Gilead, the last gunslinger, a kind of cross between a romantic knight and a cowboy. He is searching for the Dark Tower, the linchpin in all reality, the thing that holds all the alternate universes together. This series is where the cross-over stuff really shows up, especially in the last three books. King even goes to the trouble of writing himself into the story, which is done fairly well. The author is viewed as not a god, able to create with the stroke of a pen, but merely one who hears the voice of God speak, and must write what he hears. And he doesn't just imply this for himself, but for all writers. So, that kind of endears me to it quite a bit. I could go on and on about why I love the Dark Tower series. It's one of the few "modern fantasy" series I have completely finished.

I like Louis L'Amour stories as well. They're the only westerns I will read, simply because they portray real people in a harsh environment who aren't total monsters. As a counterpoint, "Blood Meridian" by Cormac McCarthy, while a good work, makes you think of the West as a place full of completely awful people. In Louis L'Amour's books, the people are still very real with very real flaws, but you aren't treated to a shockfest of horrifying acts in order to bring that across. And, the man does his homework. He was an itinerant worker during the Depression, and would read about a hundred or so books with about a thousand pages each over things that would bore most people every year. That alone is enough reason for me to respect him. If you ever get the opportunity, at least check out his autobiography, "Education of a Wandering Man."

Neil Gaiman, of course, is also splendid. The man is able to take the wonderfully fanciful and add just that little bit of "wrongness" to make it so sinister and enjoyable. I own both "Smoke and Mirrors" and "Fragile Things," his short story collections, as well as "American Gods," one of his novels. I have to give my main shout-out, though, to his comic series, The Sandman. This is the comic book for English Majors. Seventy or so issues filled with awesome stories in their own right and shout-outs to great works of literature. You grow to get attached to everyone in this, even most of the villains. This is mostly because there are only a handful of explicitly evil characters. Most of the guys who do bad things, no matter how horrible they might be, are simply misguided. It's got a lot of depth to it, and I recommend it to just about anyone.

That's about it, really. There are other works by other authors, to be sure. But these ones that I have mentioned are the ones that really stand out to me.

Snorkeling and Creep

So, I went snorkeling today. Saw many scorpion fish, about 3 or so. Also saw some rock-boring sea urchins, some brittle stars, some Moorish Idols, those triggerfish with the really long Hawaiian name, a hermit crab with sea anemones, and a bristle worm. It was all very fun and I can't wait to go out and do it again next week. Really awesome time. :)

Still poking at Hearts in the Sea. It's coming along all right, so far. All I'm really doing is poking at sentences here and there, though I've managed to make it about a thousand words longer just by doing that. There are a handful of scenes that I want to add as well, but I can't really seem to get them put in. Oh well, I will get it at some point, haha.

I've also been told I should finish Creep. For those of you who don't know what Creep is, it's a story about this kid who is thrown into a 1920s style city full of fantasy creatures. Some of these creatures have killed his sister pretty horribly, so he's there to kill quite a few of them. He wears black bandages wrapped around his head and calls himself Creep. Basically, the entire story is a study in vengeance, showing what happens when someone decides that someone has done something worthy of dying.

I posted about ten chapters of it on YWS, but stopped after that. People didn't really like it because it was written in a very pulp style. There was too much action, and not enough talking and getting to know Creep. Which I thought was hilarious, kind of. There's nothing to get to know about Creep. He's a bad guy, consumed in his vengeance. And, I argue that being unsure about a character is good. If you know too much, then there are no surprises.

But, someone has been telling me I need to finish Creep. And I would really like to. His story really interests me and I would enjoy writing it. It's just, I am afraid of people deconstructing it and down-talking it because it is written in the pulp style. I like my pulp. It's a lot more fun to read than a lot of the legitimate stuff that's out there, I can say that much. So, I may try again, or I may just hold off. If I do choose to hold off, it's all right. I've got a million other projects to work on, including my epic. So, it would be no great loss to postpone finishing Creep for a while longer.